A BURNS NIGHT ADDRESS
To : Tha’ very best a’ friends including some very SAGE ADVICE!
Delivered in the style of a proper Burns-night address – raucus, bawdy, heartfelt and true and always well-anointed with a true Scots Whisky – on this occasion an AUCHONTOSHAN 3 RIVERS – SINGLE MALT.
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A good evening to thee my lassies and my laddies fair
We, who hath known each other for many-a, many-a – l-o-ong, long y-are
Afore we drink an’are toast and wish each otha’ tha’ best a’ best in wishes, hopes an’ prayer
I’ll settle thee down with a few chosen thoughts most rare –
To wish thee upon thy way – this Special wee night and through the ‘coming’ y-are –
I’ll send ye all awa’ wi’ the heartiest of endeavour from a bosom most bare –
A heart-shaped bond so tightly adorned ma’ sleeve, tis blood-red, warm and pulsing,
A fetal heart-beat to tell thee all – THAT knowing folks like thee makes life so much more absolving
It raiseth expectation, ma’ clemency, ma’ charity and my ambition
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Your conversation, manners, warmth of embrace all afford me a fond transition
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Another charter to carry on withstanding the crappy shit – life sometimes hurls –
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at all of us here – both us handsome men and thee, ye three pretty girls.
Remember this then my chubby little frens’ when trial o’ life and angst a’ thought amount to put us under.
Just lift your kilts, lift your skirts, then purse your arse and let it thunder!
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Delivered successfully at a Burns night supper on Burns Night 2020 – 5th. Jan. 2020
– It receiveth much applause